Donald Rumsfeld

Why you annoy me:

• Your Neocon ideas of American imperialist hegemony are not only wrong-headed and morally indefensible, but betray a lack of understanding of the basic cause and effect relationships that define the universe as we know it. 
• Related to that, you have supported ruthless rightwing dictators who overthrew elected democratic governments who were a bit too left leaning for our mega-corps to exploit.  And then when we have terrorist attacks you pretend like we are victims.  “You mean Iran hates us because we supported the tyrannical Shah instead of their democratically elected government, not because they ‘hate freedom?’”  No shit!  We have known about equal and opposite reactions since at least the 1600’s, why is this news to Neocons?
• You are probably personally responsible for the deaths of hundreds of thousands of innocent people.  How much what happened under Reagan is your fault or Reagan’s is irrelevant, you are both going to hell.
• You blatantly lied about WMD in Iraq.  The 1000+ dead Americans, to say nothing of dead Iraqis, are at least partly on your conscious, you scumbag.
• You are a hypocrite.
• If the sun were as cold as your black heart, we’d all be dead.
• I wouldn’t doubt that you are a sexual deviant.
• What the fuck are you always squinting for?!

 Possible mitigating factors:

• You aren’t a “moral conservative.”  You do not suffer from a nauseating blend of moral haughtiness and bad Christian dogma.
• Most people can look at you and realize that you are evil; to state it another way, you aren’t fooling anybody.
• You would have made a great Soviet party leader in the 1970’s.  You have the perfect mix of militarism and lack of care for the common man to handle that job.
• You aren’t suitable to hold any elected office, and thankfully you haven’t.
• When you die your skull will be the drinking gourd of Satan while your body is subjected to endless excruciating tortures of unspeakable perversion; conversely, the souls of all the innocent women and children you murdered will be resting in eternal paradise.

Three years later:  You are virtually gone from the national scene.  Without doing research, I can be reasonably sure of what you're up to: lobbying for companies in regulated industries and sitting as an honorary board member for various conservative backed business entities.  None of the awful atrocities you committed have been adequately resolved and your legacy of evil continues.  As the death toll in Iraq continues to mount you continue to become more annoying.

Verdict:  More annoying.

Contact me.