Thirty-somethings

Why you annoy me:

• You still remember your 20’s, a period when you may have been hip or attractive.  Those days are long, long gone, but you don’t realize it and act like you are still awesome.  That annoys everyone around you.
• You say ridiculously uncool phrases no one in their right mind would say and don’t realize how annoying it is.  Some examples are, “cool beans,” “snap!” “radical (in a non-ironic way),” “cold as ice,” “keep that on the DL,” “Most def.”
• You have possibly the worst taste in fashion.  Your kind are especially fond of khaki, polo shirts, weaved belts, and dock shoes.  Add to that mix sun glasses that were in styles popular in 1991 and you complete the annoying package. 
• You are the age demographic most likely to have a Nextel phone.
• You, almost to a person, have an inflated sense of your own self worth.  That middle management job sure went to your head.
• You drink imported beer exclusively.  Not because you prefer the taste, but because you think you must in order to fit in with your douche bag friends.

 Possible mitigating factors:

• Someday I’ll be your age, and of course none of this will apply to me since I am completely awesome.
• Everyone, the people younger AND older, recognize what a huge joke your whole generation is.
• Since your generation came out right before the tech boom you aren’t as tech savvy as mine and you will be pre-maturely replaced in the job market.  We are going to eat your whole generation for breakfast economically.  How will it feel to be 45 and still in that middle management job taking orders from a 31 year old from my generation?
• You can’t fight anymore, so while you tend to be big shit talkers amongst your friends you always back down because the last thing you want to do is get into a bar fight with a twenty-something.

3 Years Later:  As I get closer to 30 I see little change in how lame 30 year olds are, except to say that I am more attracted to 30 year old women than I used to be.  I would actually say that they are getting less annoying except that I am surrounded by them a lot more.  Exposure to 30 somethings does not make them more palatable. 

Verdict: Just as annoying.

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