Chic Fil A
 

Why you annoy me:

• You sandwiches aren’t tasty.  Period.
• Your waffle fries aren’t all they are made out to be.
• You employ lots of teen labor.  Granted teens need jobs, but your practices smell suspiciously like a ploy to get cheap labor, not to help kids.
• You are closed on Sunday.  I’m not sure which brand of Christianity your owner is, but it’s probably the dumbest business practice I’ve ever heard of.
• You released a series of comic books in your kids’ meals that each had a specific moral message.  That’s nauseatingly bad.  Far be it for me to tell people what moral messages kids should get, but I do know that whatever message is told, a fast food restaurant is not the one to deliver it.
• Your grotesque cow ad campaigns don’t make me want to eat chicken or beef.
• Everyone knows Church’s Chicken is way better than Chic Fil A.
• What do you have against cheese?

 Possible mitigating factors:

• You don’t charge for free refills.  This should be standard practice, but it seems that many a mall eatery is now charging for this.  Kudos for not trying to milk another fifty cents out of your customers.
• Your food tastes better than Subway’s and is cheaper.  I’m not sure how much that says, but I guess at worst it means you aren’t the worst eatery in the mall.
• No, really, what do you have against cheese?

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Update: 1/29/06

I was in the mall yesterday deciding what to have for lunch.  Then I noticed it: a huge sign at Chic Fil A highlighting the fact that THEY NOW PUT CHEESE ON THEIR SANDWICHES!  I do believe that means I win.  Chic Fil A, after years of being anti-cheese has capitulated to my pro-cheese campaign.  In any event, they are still annoying for all the other reasons, however, they now make good food.  I heartily recommend that you all go to Chic Fil A and get their standard chicken sandwich and ask them to add cheese.  It is fucking great.